Huge pierced clitorisIs that a huge clitoris or a tiny penis?

If it's a cock, I can see the helmet but where are the testicles?

If your winky looks anything like that then you must take a look at this article onpenis enlargement or this page of penis enlargers.



Ladyman with hard penisLooks like she's pleased to see you!









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If girls are made of sugar and spice, why do they smell of fish?
~ Anon.

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Gay Soap DispenserI'll say no more...


















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A policeman on the beat in Soho one night found a young lad and asked him what he was doing out so late.

The young lad said he was looking for a 'lady of the night'.

The policeman asked him why he would do such a thing.

The young lad told him that he wanted to contract a dose (sexually transmitted disease) from the hooker and then pass it on to his au pair. His father would catch it from the au pair and give it to his mother who would then pass it on to the gardener. And he's the bastard who killed my pet frog!

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Free Porn Previews

Get a seriously stiff penis for nothing!

Taste My Sugar Cane - Porn DVD CoverTaste My Sugar Cane - Porn ClipIt's nice to have a hard penis, especially when it's for FREE!

Check out these DVD Previews. They're great!

The one on the left is my favourite. It's called Taste My Sugar Cane and the preview shows a very pretty girl sucking a very stiff cock. She's giving it a really good wet sucking and then the camera pans down...

The girl has a massive vibrator up her pussy and she pulls it out slowly. She then holds it next to the real penis (which now looks very modest) and takes it in turn to suck the pair.

The girl is really enjoying herself and it shows...

Don't take my word for it, go take a look for yourself, if you're a guy, you'll get a hard-on and if you a girl you'll get a wide-on. I guarantee it!

And just in case you're wondering, I believe that the vibrator up that lovely girl's pussy is the King Kong, it's 14" (35cm) long and 3" (7.5cm) wide. It's the biggest vibrator I've found on the web.

An English guy emigrated from London to the Australian outback as he wanted a slower paced life.

He bought a farm miles from any where and for the first three months was blissfully happy.

But as time pressed on he began to miss human company and his solitude no longer seemed to suite him.

So, one day, when he saw dust rising in the distance, his heart skipped a beat with excitement. Someone was coming to visit him!

An old pick-up truck pulled into his farm and out jumped a dinky dye Aussie man with a big smile on his face.

The guy apologised for not coming over sooner as he was his nearest neighbour. Been shearing sheep and all that.

Then he invited him over to a party he was throwing at his place the following weekend. There's gonna be a lotta fighting and a lotta fucking he told the English guy.

Greatful for the invite but somewhat taken aback buy the Aussie guy's forwardness, he asked if there were many people going.

"Na!" said the Aussie guy, "Just the two of us!"

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Once upon a time a guy asked his best friend how he managed to pull so many girls at the local disco.

His friend told him his technique:

Wait for the last dance and while you're dancing slowly, whisper in the girl's ear "Tickle your cunt with a feather".

If the girl replies "Yes please" or something similar, as they most often do. Then you're in.

But if the girl replies "What did you say!" or something similar in outrage. Then you reply "It's typical country weather" and that gets you off the hook.

So, the very next week, the guy sees a girl he fancies and manages to get the last dance with her.

He pulls her in nice and close and whispers in her ear "Tickle your cunt with a feather".

The girl freezes, steps back and demands "What did you say!"

The guy blushes and blurts out "It's fucking pissing down outside!"

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Sexy Bubble Arse In Car

The Ultimate In Car Entertainment!

Image of a naked girl in back of carNow that is a very nice bubble arse! That's the sort of arse any guy would love to have in the back of his car.

Lovely narrow waist and she's got a very nice pair of tits as well!.

She reminds me of a girl called Sally that I used to go out with years ago. After we left the pub we would drive to a quite spot for some serious fucking. Sally would strip naked in the front seat next to me while I was driving and on some occasions would suck my penis as I was driving. She also liked having my middle finger up her arse while I fucked her. What a girl!

Can any one say what type of car it is from the interior?

Does any one care?





Vagina with tattoo of butterfly around itNow that's a butterfly that I would love to mount!

Looks more like a Rear Admiral than a Red Admiral.














Cunnilingus

Drinking From The Furry Cup

I kissed her lips tenderly, then she crossed her legs and broke my glasses!
~ Anon.

Pig with a penis head.This animal, which is either called a Pork-U-Penis or a Pull-Me-Pull-Me, probably never actually existed except in a womans fevered imagination.

I believe it was this animal that gave rise to the saying:

I WANT TO PORK YOU.





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Massive Testicles

What a load of bollocks!

Man with very large bollocks.I once had a girlfriend that told me that testicles were far more interesting than a penis.

She'd have loved this guys wedding tackle!

This lucky guy has a big fat cock as well!

Mind you, he can't wear Speedo's on the beach...



Here's a fun loving cock!

A party penis.















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Reminds me of a joke:

Q: What's the difference between an egg and a wank?

A: You can beat an egg!











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Girl pushing Coke bottle up her vagina.It's amazing what girls will push up their vagina's.

Why can't they just settle for some good hard throbbing cock?




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Just thought you should know that the Quality Adult Sex DVDs SPECIAL OFFER CONTINUES

EACH 3rd DVD IS FREE - DELIVERY IS FREE

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Suck Your Own Penis

Also Known As: Auto-Fellatio

How cool is that!

Now that IS something that all guys would love to be able to do!







Two nuns were in the bath together.

One says "Where's the soap?"

The other says "Yes it does doesn't it!"

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Two nuns were riding on a tandem bicycle down a steep cobble stoned hill...One says to the other "I haven't come this way before!"

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A nun got expelled from her convent yesterday, she was seen doing press-ups in the Cucumber patch.

What's this little fella up to?

Do you think he might want to shoot up the sherif?















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